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    May 28

    没有人喜欢寂寞

    一个五月末的下午,太阳懒洋洋地挂在天上,无精打采的渗着热,身上像抹了一层黄油,融开,一阵风来又凝上,接着再融开,反复几次,人就好像吃多了廉价的意大利面,几欲作呕却又昏昏欲睡。明明欲睡,却有布置在大脑深处的那一根弦格外的敏感,直觉里周围走的跳的笑的那些个人都是自得其乐,唯独我与这光景格格不入。

      这些日子好多了,起码每天可以两点之前入睡,一切都开始井井有条起来。甚至早上起床之后还有兴致悠悠然地读上一段小说,这可是很久不曾有的平和了。中午顶着太阳来学校,在自己的研究席,泡一杯红茶,嗅着茶香发一会儿呆,然后去上课。为了不与睡魔为伍,特地坐在离老师最近的位置。

    老爷子一如既往毫无抑扬顿挫地飘了一个半钟头,下课,走人。回到研究席,照旧发一会儿的呆,接着开始翻译FCPA,边用功边怀疑自己的耐心,此时少有的兢兢业业,一坐就是三个小时。周围特别的静,偶尔抬眼,明明有人走动,低下头来,就毫无声息。抬眼,低首,抬眼,低首。。。模模糊糊中如隔世一般的寥落,似乎有一个玻璃做的大箱子,他们在箱外,我和我的桌子在箱里,或者,相反。

    天黑了,九点半,该回家了,九点半的校舍空荡荡的,好在月光如水,伴着凉风,中庭弥漫着轻快的暗。嗅着月光的香快步走出,灌多了FCPA的脑袋一路浑浑噩噩,直到走到了三田站前的人行道。很宽的马路,很多的车,红灯的时间格外得长,因为是无遮无挡很宽的马路,所以有很大的风,站在等待的人群里,大脑终于从FCPA解放开,可是风却也吹动了大脑深处的那根弦。风中,人群里,红灯,被风吹起的衣角,斜背着的包,隔壁便利店的灯光凝成了眼角的一点茫然。此时,更是格外的珍惜自己路灯下拉长的那个孑孓的影子。

    寂寞既然不可摆脱,那就享受它好了,没有人喜欢寂寞,只是,不喜欢失望罢了,只是,不喜欢失望罢了。

    Comments (2)

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    芳 聂wrote:
    享受寂寞,拒绝孤单!
    May 31
    萍 黄wrote:
     朝は早く起きて一緒に勉強しよう。そうしたら夜早く帰っていいね。――先輩の話。
    May 28

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